Unfair choice

You didnt choose this,

You know you didnt!

You didnt choose to have to pick between hospitals, helplines, and pills.

You didnt choose to have everything taken away by only your mind and its violent thoughts.

You didnt choose to have to call you psychiatrist up on a random Thursday morning,

just becouse you fell back right where you started,

Eventho you are the happiest you have ever been.

But you wont be able to acces that

You wont even be able to acces your creative mind.

You have to give up something that means the world to you,

just so others dont have to lay body into the dirt before its time.

So you scream and kick ,

and daydream about slitting your wrists open.

You feel almost completely alone in this.

They have unzipped your brain

just to take away your reason to live

You believed for years that you were put on this planet,

only to create , and they have numbed that part out of you.

Calling it unfair doesnt seem to cover it

You cant live without your creatavity

You would rather die than to have to give up creating.

And as your friends point out, that a dead person cant create,

you only shrug at them.

You feel lost

So lost that you feel there isnt anyone who might be able to understand 

Still you you choose to take the dosage at night

And once again you have no idea how to go on